Welcome new friends and old to another round of Make a Change Monday. Our five weekly tips usually focus on different aspects of nutrition and fitness, but today we are getting personal.
There has been extensive research on the health benefits of good friends. Weight Watchers teaches you to surround yourself with positive influences. And positive thinking never hurt anyone.
None of these tips will be earth-shattering, but it's worth reminding you that the little things can make a difference in your life and the lives of your friends.
Listen. Stop talking about yourself, the things you're doing, your kids, your amazing vacation, your problems. Stop and listen to your friends. Listen to what they have to say. It’s amazing what you’ll learn about friends that you’ve known for years if you actually listen to them. Which leads perfectly into our next tip.
Ask questions. The more you ask, the more you will know. But don’t just ask, listen to the answer. From your own experience, you know there are few things better than the feeling of someone caring about what’s going on in your life, while there are few things as frustrating as someone asking a question without listening to the answer.
And don’t simply listen to the answer, remember it. Following up with someone about a detail from a previous conversation, even if it’s as simple as, “How was the date you went on?” or “Did everything work out with your brother?”, will make your friends feel that you are vested in their lives.
Use good manners. Your Mom was right then and still is today, good manners will get you far in life, and even further with friends. A simple, “Please,” and “Thank you,” embody a sense of respect and appreciation in a way that not many phrases can.
Although no longer a societal norm, politeness and being gracious can be a valuable part of any friendship because let’s face it, everyone wants to feel appreciated.
Reach out. Keep up to date with the goings-on in your friends’ lives. Even if it’s only a text, it lets them know that they’re in your thoughts. It’s always nice to feel loved, and you know that. Throw a compliment their way and it could brighten their day. It only takes a minute.
Do something. Get coffee or dinner or lunch or a bagel or go golfing or catch a game, the point is see them. Seeing friends reduces your stress levels, gets you out of the office or away from the library, and allows you to enjoy each other’s company. Do something out of the box and bond over a new, shared experience.
Be a good friend and you will quickly be surrounded by the supportive community you need.
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